The gyms in Ireland closed this week. The tears you shed when you realised you couldn't go to the gym are pathetic. Okay, not pathetic, but I have to be provocative in order to enforce self-reflection. Or, at least that was the case for me. Come along with me...
Psychological projection describes the deep contempt we feel for those who reflect those characteristics we least like about ourselves, or so the theory goes. In this case, when I see people so deeply upset about not being able to attend the gym, I feel contempt. Not necessarily for you, but certainly for my 21-year-old self.
It forces me to reflect on times gone by where the gym filled a God-shaped hole. The biggest challenge for a secular society is to choose an appropriate replacement for that guiding light, and it's not so clear what that should be. For some of us, it might be our other "identities" (sex/gender, profession, nationalities, hobbies, race/ethnicity, etc.). For me, and for many, it is/was the gym. And, unfortunately, there are many
off-target effects of filling that hole with dumbbells, including relationship and career trade-offs, and more.
Okay Gary, chill out brother, you are being hyperbolic, it's an hour or two of training, not a 4-hour Orthodox ceremony...
Are you sure about that?
Find me a bodybuilder with a "Monster Factory" t-shirt and not only will I be able to tell you what foods they eat, roughly how many meals they eat, and who they follow, but I will even be able to tell you what they did in the hour before bed last night and what shoes are on their feet (Vibrams...). From the moment they wake to the moment they sleep, many of their behaviours are guided by rituals and memes
built into fitness culture.
It's never just the gym. It's never just the act of exercising. It's all that comes with that. For many people, the way in which they live their "fitness lifestyle" is very similar to the most devout religious worshippers. And no, this isn't necessarily a bad thing, and has huge benefits - please, keep training.
Bringing it back to my central point, why would I bother to take issue with people being so upset about the closure of gyms?
Primarily, it concerns me because I'm not sure everyone who ends up with fitness as their central source of meaning and purpose in life really wants that. Sometimes, it's simply the case that alternatives are not clear and thus something is better than nothing. I have seen this happen many times over the years (to some degree, to me) to people who ended up on the following
path:
- Love the gym.
- Assume this is a good career path and/or competitive path (e.g. bodybuilding).
- Devote most of their time and effort.
- Realise that when your hobby becomes a life, it's not always as wonderful as you expected.
- Struggle to re-define yourself years later.
So, no, I don't think you are a bad person for missing the gym, nor am I denying any adverse effects it has had on your psychological wellbeing. I sure as hell miss it. I love training, and the thought of doing chin-ups in the rain for the Winter isn't exactly the most exciting. However, all I ask is that you question the role the gym may be playing in your life.
Some of us end up on a path where our values and subsequent behaviours are reinforced by our social media exposures. For example, it may be that you have gotten used to progress pictures and/or your reflection in the mirror being your metric of progress. This gets reinforced as you continue sharing photos on Instagram each week, to which you get positive feedback from others like you. It's hard to break the cycle if you don't
see it as a problem, or if you don't see any alternatives among your pseudo-tribe.
This is something I have actually long admired about Mr Patrick Farrell (the other half of Triage). Despite having many odd characteristics, much like myself, he at the very least feels like an individual who is not simply an emergent property of a single source of memes (e.g. the online fitness community). If you are a carbon copy of another person, I have no interest in being around you, and I am often disgusted
with myself when I de-individualise myself in such a way. Harsh, I know, but hey, Kanye made a similar point in his latest podcast with Joe Rogan and that's good enough for me.
Anyway, I'm getting lost now, but do me a favour and think about it. Use this time to think about what contributes to your sense of fulfilment. It certainly won't harm you.
Finally, for the record, I have absolutely no gripe with business owners being pissed about the gyms being closed and contesting government decisions, nor am I denying the role of exercise in health, including psychological wellbeing. Those points are entirely separate. It's rough for us at Triage for the gyms to be closed. It affects our business, and I'd certainly rather they were open. I also think it's completely
appropriate for people to question and criticise government actions, as that is a right we are privileged to have. However, on a personal level, being antifragile to the closure of gyms involves me strategising to find other ways to train, to spend my time productively, etc.
That's it from me. Stay well, and if you do need any advice on overcoming the struggle of absence from the gym with other training strategies, please reach out.
See you next week.
